Chaotic
by MikariStar
Summary: Delia told Giovanni they had a ten year old son. Naturally, he was curious about the boy and found out exactly how difficult it is to deal with a hyper, easily excited, aspiring pokemon master. Crackfic!
1. Chapter 1

Delia told Giovanni they had a ten year old son. Naturally, he was curious about the boy and found out exactly how difficult it is to deal with a hyper, easily excited, aspiring pokemon master. Crackfic!

I should warn you this is a crackfic, meaning it is to be taken as a joke. For a serious 'Giovanni is Ash's dad' story read 'Don't Give Me Diamonds'.

Chaotic

"Ash, honey, be careful," his mother's warning took him to the past, to a time when he was much smaller, just barely able to speak.

"Pokemon!" Back then he wanted to pet and hug every pokemon he saw, he loved them all.

At the time his mother had spoken the words in worry, while running towards him, arriving just on time to pick him up before the Raticate snapped at him. It wasn't wild, it was one of Professor Oak's pokemon, but it was in a foul mood that day and having a little boy cling to it only made it worse.

In the present Delia's words were calmer, though just as vigorous. She trusted Ash, now a pokemon trainer possessing eight badges, to be old and experienced enough to handle the situation.

In the background, Giovanni scolded someone over a small communication device, tinier than a pokedex. The device was black with a red R on it. Though he diverted his attention from the conversation long enough to pull Ash's hand back before Persian snapped at him.

"Persian bites?" Ash had been watching the feline's claws warily, despite Giovanni having told the pokemon not to scratch Ash. It seemed Persian found a way around it.

"Yes he does," Giovanni stated the obvious, wondering how many times Delia had to do it over the past years. "Don't do that," he told the pokemon, then turned back to his conversation, "no, he doesn't, yes, I already told you to go ahead with the plan. What? I wasn't talking to you!"

While Ash continued attempting to become friends with Persian, Delia cleared her throat and smiled sweetly.

Knowing not to push his luck, Giovanni clicked the communications device shut. "I can't even take a day off without Team Rocket falling apart."

Delia grinned, "you'll stay for a few days, right? We have so much to catch up on!"

"Yeah, stay!" Ash agreed. He had many things to ask, mostly about what pokemon his father had. He was also yet to have a father-son pokemon battle, unless he counted Pikachu shocking Giovanni when they first met. Ash assured it was nothing to worry about because Pikachu had shocked him when they first met too. Even Delia had been on the receiving end of the attack when she was seeing Ash off on his pokemon journey for the first time. It was just Pikachu's special way to greet his family.

Delia had thought that the news of Giovanni and Ash being father and son would produce what could be best defined as a total freak out on both parts, but they were handling it quite well. Perhaps it was a certain unspoken understanding between pokemon trainers much alike in stubbornness and other aspects. Pikachu and Persian were another story, quarrelling like siblings with a rivalry from the start.

"I want to see all your pokemon and have a battle and... and I have to call Gary!" Ash rushed over to the videophone. The Indigo League was a couple of weeks away and the two Pallet Town trainers were taking a short break in their home. Misty and Brock had gone for a quick visit to their respective homes, though they would soon join Ash again before the Indigo League began.

"Oh, dear," Delia sighed, "you did bring strong pokemon to battle with, didn't you?"

"Of course," Giovanni replied, "but there is that one pokemon I didn't bring... I'll call for it." After a quick call on the little black device with the red R, Giovanni waited quietly until an unusual pokemon appeared before him. "Teleportation, Mewtwo is a psychic type."

"Awesome!" Ash cheered at the top of his lungs. "We'll beat them; we'll beat them for sure!"

"I knew it," it was just as Delia guessed; their little reunion would soon become an argument of 'my father has better pokemon than yours' between Ash and Gary.

When the bell rang, Ash rushed to open the door, "Gary? Oh, it's you guys," it was Misty and Brock at the door. "Guess what? I have a father, come see!" Ash pulled them in, as if to show them a new toy he got.

In the mist of the distraction, Jessie, James and Meowth arrived and entered the house. There was no elaborate plan to seal Pikachu this time, simply a pair of rubber gloves. Walking right up to Pikachu and picking him up was their most anti-climatic and effective plan yet.

"Pikachu!" The little yellow electric pokemon loudly complained.

"Pikachu!" Ash called out realizing that his precious pokemon was being stolen.

"What are you two doing here?" It was then that Jessie, James and Meowth noticed Giovanni's presence.

"Boss!" The trio exclaimed in unison.

"We stole this Pikachu for you!" Jessie handed it over, not thinking about his lack of rubber gloves.

This time Pikachu didn't shock Giovanni as he was swiftly passed along to Ash. "Don't you three have some real work to do?"

The Team Rocket trio stood there open mouthed, they finally captured the Pikachu they had been after for such a long time and managed to hold on to it long enough to give it to the boss, though Pikachu's captivity hasn't been all that long this time either. All their hard work ended in vain when Giovanni returned the Pikachu to Ash, throwing away months of effort in a split second.

"Boss, why did you do that?" Jessie couldn't believe it.

"After all our hard work," James could just about cry.

"I don't understand anything," Meowth complained.

"Persian! Per sian per per persian persian," Persian explained in the language of pokemon, which would be translated to 'idiots! That boy is my annoying little brother."

"What do you mean the twerp is your brother? That doesn't make any sense and there's no way the boss could be your real father, you're a pokemon!" Meowth knew that Persian had the crazy notion that Giovanni was his father. Maybe it could be explained in that he had been with Giovanni since he was a baby, but to say Ash was his brother was too much.

"Persian persian," the proud pokemon declared, meaning 'you're just jealous.'

"Dad, tell them not to try to steal Pikachu again," Ash complained, "or any of my pokemon."

"Don't try to steal my son's pokemon," Giovanni voiced automatically, feeling a little odd doing so.

Jessie, James and Meowth were left in open mouthed shock again and twitching slightly, they exited the house, muttering something along the lines of a 'twerp' being the 'mini-boss'.

The rocket trio's departure was followed by the arrival of Gary, who had brought his father as requested by Ash. His childhood rival claimed that he had found out who his father was and he had very strong pokemon, though Gary was quick to assume Ash was exaggerating. "I'm here with my dad just like you wanted, are you ready to lose the battle?"

"Outside!" Delia warned, she could not allow a pokemon battle in the middle of her living room.

As the little crowd gathered in the yard, Gary noticed the super strong pokemon that had defeated him before, "it's that pokemon and the Viridian gym leader! Why are they here?"

Ash grinned victoriously, "dad and his pokemon are here for our battle." Having defeated Gary in the past had unknowingly made Giovanni score a few extra points with Ash. While Gary complained to his father about the supernatural powers of their opponents' pokemon, which the older man thought was just an exaggeration; Ash happily bounced over to Giovanni and repeatedly asked, "can I borrow your rare pokemon? Can I? Please? Can I?"

"Alright, alright," Giovanni reluctantly agreed, "Mewtwo, Ash will be your trainer for this battle..."

"Go everyone!" Gary tossed out six pokeballs, with fully evolved pokemon popping out. "Dad your pokemon, call them all out!"

"Twelve on twelve? This will be quite the battle," Gary's father had no idea what he was getting into when he called out his pokemon.

"Let's go Mewtwo! Use your strongest attack!" Ash commanded.

"No!" Giovanni couldn't stop them on time and a large explosion shook Pallet Town.

"My house!" The group now stood in the middle of a crater amidst a town of ruins and Delia was very upset about it. "Giovanni Rocketto! I tell you we have a son and the first thing you do is let him play with a dangerous pokemon that blows up the house and leaves the entire town in ruins, maybe I shouldn't have told you anything."

"How was I supposed to know he was going to tell Mewtwo to use his strongest attack!" Giovanni tried to come up with an excuse.

"Of course he would, kids are all about overkill!" Delia scolded.

"Sorry mom," Ash apologized, but didn't seem really sorry seeing as all twelve of the opposing pokemon had fainted.

"We'll get you for this!" Gary yelled, "right dad?"

"We're getting out of here!" Mr. Oak quickly escaped, dragging his son along. He always knew the neighbors were a little odd, but he didn't think they were crazy enough to keep a nuclear bomb of a pokemon in the house.

Ash smiled at Misty and Brock, who stood in shock for a while, finally waking up several minutes later and congratulating him on the fast victory. Albeit they weren't sure if they should be congratulating Ash, scolding him for the mess, or perhaps sympathizing with his parents.

"What a mess and I just vacuumed this morning," Delia frowned at the crater that now was where her house used to be.

"You could come live with me," Giovanni offered.

Delia sighed, "I suppose we don't have much of a choice..."

"Then it's decided," Giovanni called for a transport and a helicopter soon arrived.

"This doesn't mean we're back together or anything," Delia clarified.

"Whatever you say," Giovanni put his arm around her, hearing whatever he wanted to hear.

Delia, Giovanni, Ash, Misty and Brock crammed into the helicopter, along with Pikachu, Persian and Mewtwo, who never went into their pokeballs, Misty had shoved Togepi in her backpack. The helicopter took off, later landing in the Viridian City gym where the chaos would continue.

End?

Disclaimer, I don't own Pokemon.

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	2. Chapter 2

This was supposed to be a one shot, but you know how the crackbunnies can be. Again, this is in no way a serious story!

Chaotic 2

A few days later... "Ah!" James' voice echoed all over Team Rocket's headquarters, aka the Viridian City Gym, as he accidentally hammered his finger again.

"Stop complaining and hurry up with those nails, we need to get on Delia's good side," Jessie scolded him. Delia wanted to put up some pictures to make Giovanni's living space homier for her and Ash, since they were now living with him.

"Does the boss even know about this and why do we need to get on her good side? I don't think we were on her bad side in the first place, yesterday she gave us cookies," James reminded.

"That's not the point, she gave everyone cookies. Listen, the boss likes Delia and they have a son and they live in the same place, they might get back together. We've disappointed the boss too many times, but if we get a new lady boss it'll be like a fresh start and we'll have a better chance to get promoted," Jessie explained.

Meowth looked thoughtful at the situation, "wait a minute, two bosses means room for two top cats!"

"I think Delia already has a pokemon, some Mr. Mime or something," James reminded.

"Yeah, but that's not cool, she needs a cute pokemon like me," thus Meowth ran off to search for Delia, hoping to become the boss lady's favorite pokemon, leaving Jessie and James to deal with hanging the pictures all over the walls.

As Meowth dashed out of the room, Giovanni entered followed by his loyal spoiled Persian. "What are you two doing?"

"We're hanging pictures, boss!" Jessie cheered, smiling proudly at being caught working; she had snatched the hammer away from James to get more credit.

"I never said you could cover my walls with pictures!" Giovanni complained.

Jessie shoved the hammer back into James' hands, but he dropped it and it fell on his foot, while Jessie blamed him, "that's what I told James, but he wouldn't listen to me."

"But you said, Delia said," James babbled while hopping on one foot.

"Oh how lovely!" Delia entered the room, Meowth must have missed her. "You two did a wonderful job hanging these pictures."

"You told them to do this?" Giovanni inquired.

Delia smiled cheerfully, "yes, I did, this way the place looks cozy, doesn't it."

Giovanni examined the pictures; they were of Ash at various ages, albeit from age ten to the present he looked exactly the same.

Ash came in at that moment, spotting his baby pictures on the wall, "mom, that's embarrassing, I don't want those pictures to be there!"

"I think they look lovely," Delia insisted, "don't you agree with me, Giovanni?"

"Yeah sure, whatever you say; love you too," Giovanni remembered one thing, a basic rule of survival he had learned long ago: never disagree with Delia. He also still heard whatever he wanted to hear.

Ash pouted, "I don't want my baby pictures on the wall; I can't let Pikachu, Misty and Brock see that!"

"Where are your friends anyway?" Giovanni hoped they weren't doing something evil, like retuning the stolen pokemon to their owners; that would be troublesome, though not as bad as it would be if they discovered his secret stash of ice-cream and were devouring it."

"We got separated, Pikachu, Misty and Brock are somewhere around here, I didn't know this place had so many secret underground passages," Ash explained.

"I'll send Mewtwo to find them," Giovanni called the pokemon on that same convenient little black communication device with a red R he carried wherever he went, to be able to instantly boss people around anytime, anywhere.

"Can we hide the baby pictures before they get here?" Ash pleaded.

"Alright I'll have them hidden," Giovanni agreed, "you two, hide Ash's baby pictures."

"Yes sir!" Jessie and James saluted.

"I want to keep those pictures!" Delia stopped them.

"Yes, ma'am!" Jessie and James saluted again.

"Hide them before Mewtwo gets back with Pikachu, Misty and Brock!" Ash urged and made a sad face at Giovanni, which was also noticed by Delia. "You agree with me, don't you dad?"

"I can't believe you would upset Ash," Delia scolded.

"I'm not upsetting him, I do agree!" Giovanni defended.

Unfortunately, he had trapped himself in a lose-lose situation with Delia, "oh so you don't agree with me then?"

"I agree with both of you!" Giovanni tried to keep them both happy.

"You can't!" Mother and son argued back.

Giovanni looked back and forth between them, "I give up!"

There was a moment of silence, "well I suppose we could put away some of the pictures, but I still want to keep a few of them here."

"Good idea," Ash agreed, "keep the ones were I look cool."

Peace once again reigned in the Viridian Gym as the picture argument was resolved, right on time for Mewtwo to teleport in with Pikachu, Misty and Brock.

"It's like a maze around here," Misty spotted one of Ash's baby pictures, the last one he was taking off the wall. "Aw, little Ash!" She snatched it away, "so cute!"

"Give that back!" Ash tried to recover it.

"But you've been the same for so many years, it's nice to see a different side of you," Misty held on to the picture.

Ash quickly forgot about it and instead focused on the greatest mystery of his life. "Why is it that I'm still a kid? I should be in my twenties by now."

"Do you think maybe you're in a coma and all of this is a dream?" Brock wondered.

There was a moment of silence then a collective "nah!" and the topic was soon forgotten.

Meowth come back and saw Delia, "I was looking for you, I'll be your loyal pokemon, I'm way better than a Mr. Mime!"

"Mr. Mime? Oh yes, Mimey! I forgot, I left him in a pokeball at home, but the house isn't there anymore..." Delia paused, and looked at Meowth, "oh well, you're right, a cat is way cuter than a clown, forget Mimey, you're my new pokemon pal, Meowth!"

"Really, I'll be the boss lady's top cat?" Meowth's eyes shone with joy.

However, that joy was short lived, "that's what I would say, but you're already Jessie and James' pokemon and I don't want to take you away from them. Maybe Giovanni will share Persian with me." She petted Persian who stuck out his tongue at Meowth.

"No, now he's more spoiled!" Meowth cried.

"Don't you three have something else to do?" Giovanni asked, hinting that they should go do something else.

"Not really," James admitted, "we can't steal Pikachu anymore and that's what we did all the time."

"Maybe I should fire you," Giovanni considered the possibility; he wasn't sure why he hasn't fired them a long time ago.

"James what are you saying?" Jessie interrupted, "we have a lot of stuff to do, boss! In fact, we're so busy we really need to go now!" She ran out with James and Meowth in tow.

"Giovanni, I think you should restructure Team Rocket to be an organization of good!" Delia proposed.

"I can't do that..." Giovanni didn't like were this was going.

"Sure you can!" Delia insisted. "Team Rocket will be like super heroes. They'll save pokemon instead of stealing them. It's the same concept, go around grabbing all the pokemon you see, but we'll call it a rescue instead of a robbery."

"You mean we'll be doing the same things, but with better names?" Giovanni considered it, "I guess that doesn't sound so bad."

"Exactly!" Delia cheered, "and we'll make the world a better place!"

"By taking over it?" Giovanni offered.

"Yes, we'll take over and make sure it's better," Delia agreed.

"On one condition..." the suspense suddenly hung heavily in the air as Giovanni made a dramatic pause. He looked at Ash, Pikachu, Misty, Brock, Mewtwo and Persian, who were staring at him, waiting to hear the condition. "Mewtwo, why don't you give them a tour of headquarters?"

"They already had their tour and even experienced getting lost in HQ. Besides, I know you just want to be alone with Delia," Mewtwo replied with his psychic powers.

"Fine, be that way," Giovanni took a deep breath and finally revealed his request, "instead of taking over the world as a criminal organization, I'll have Team Rocket take over the world as a super hero organization... if you marry me, again."

The audience let out a chorus of gasps and waited to hear Delia's answer. She looked surprised, "really? You still want to be married to me even after I left all those years ago?"

"Why did you leave?" In all that time Giovanni still haven't found out. "Is it because I forgot an anniversary? At least I always remember your birthday!"

"Yes, on the wrong day and it's a different day each year, but at least you tried so I'm not mad about that," Delia confessed. "The truth is that one morning I woke up and decided I hated you, so I left. Nine months later, I gave birth to Ash and realized I didn't hate you; it had all been one big mood swing. But it lasted the whole nine months and I thought that after such a long time, it was too late to come back."

"A mood swing," Giovanni twitched, "you left me because of a mood swing?"

"Well that mood swing was technically your fault because it was your son I was expecting," Delia pouted.

"Let's just forget about it and get married again," Giovanni took a diamond ring from his pocket and put it on Delia's finger.

"How exiting, I'm getting married!" Delia cheered.

The audience went "aw!" then clapped and cheered, then started chanting, "kiss! kiss! kiss!" until Delia and Giovanni kissed.

That is the story of how Giovanni and Ash found out they were father and son and how Delia and Giovanni got back together. Then Delia and Giovanni went off on a second honey moon and left Ash in charge of Team Rocket, which might not have been a good idea...

The End... for real this time.

Disclaimer, I don't own Pokemon. 


End file.
